


That First Step

by ATTHS_TWICE



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Oral Sex, Post-Episode: s11e02 This, Post-Episode: s11e03 Plus One, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 01:15:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15474252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ATTHS_TWICE/pseuds/ATTHS_TWICE
Summary: Post Plus One. Mulder and Scully “think of something” to do after their much needed conversation in a bed.





	1. Conversation In A Bed

She was running, running fast. She tripped and fell, trying to scramble up to keep going. She could hear laughing, and it sounded like her own voice. She got up, but could feel scrapes on her knees, making running harder. The laughter grew louder.

She could see Mulder off in the distance. She called out to him, but he did not hear her. She kept running limpily toward him, shouting his name.

“Dried up. No use to anyone anymore. Might as well face it, honey, he could do with a better model,” she heard a voice saying, followed by a cackling laugh.

“Mulder!” she heard herself scream, but still nothing happened. He did not hear her.

Then she saw herself step close to him and he smiled. She stopped running in confusion. Then she saw herself touch his chest, sliding her arms around his neck, he stared at her and then they kissed. Kissed in a way that she missed so much, it made her ache.

She called to him, screaming that she was not her. To stop. She tried running again, but found she was frozen in place. She tried to move and she could not do it. She fell to the ground and sobbed, raising her head to call out one last time.

She met her own eyes, her own self, and saw the knife held in her hands. “He deserves so much more than you. What can you give him? Heartache and pain? You already did that, why would you do it again? Take the knife. You know what to do,” she heard herself say as she placed the cool metal in her own hands.

She stared at it, about to drop it and leave it behind, when it was grabbed and thrust into her heart. She felt it rip into her, cutting her heart in half. She heard the cackling laugh echoing around her as she took her last gasping breath and woke up in her hotel room.

She took a deep breath and rolled over anticipating seeing her double standing there like she had seen earlier. No one was there. No devil. No monster. Not even Mulder. She lie there, on her back, taking gasping breaths, trying to a calm her racing heart and mind.

God.. that had felt so real. So believable. She could still feel the pain of the knife in her heart. The way it seemed to tear her in half. The same way she had felt for years now. Half of her missing. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and tried to calm down.

Seeing her double tonight had scared her. Truly scared her. She did not want to admit it to herself or to Mulder, but it had. Considering what it could mean, she felt.. she honestly did not know the words to describe it. She knew she was extremely creeped out and after that dream she did not know what to think.

With the attacks on both of their lives recently, she felt on edge and nervous, even without this case. She was trying to move past it, but it had been unnerving. After she was almost killed in the hospital, she felt unable to face being alone, but did not want to admit to any weakness. Mulder had simply looked at her and she knew he would not be letting her leave his side. She stayed with him for a few days and had been incredibly grateful for his support and understanding.

When this new case had been brought to Mulder’s attention, she was happy. Being away meant they spent more time together. Had a chance to do their thing they had perfected over the years. They worked well together, still the same back and forth she loved, the same ability to read each other, but she missed **him.** Missed **them**. She wanted to talk. Figure things out and move forward. They just needed.. a push.

It was hard not to believe in signs when the universe seemed to give them the exact push they needed. Only one room, a suite, was available at the hotel. She was hesitant the same way Mulder seemed to feel completely calm. Her look to him, seemed to surprise him. He appeared to be perfectly fine settling back into cohabitation.

She had wanted to get away, be close again sure, but she did not know about **that** close. Him right in the other room, undressed, and all Muldery close? No. She still wanted some space. To be able to think without the distraction he caused her. That was not going to happen while they shared a room.

She had felt better about the circumstance with the news of the pullout couch. The thought of sharing a bed was definitely too much right then. Being close to him **that** way, she was sure she would have dropped her guard. Let him in and then worried about it later. But that would not do either of them any good.

He took the pullout couch without question, though he did look at her longingly as he headed to bed. She shut the connecting door and stood there for a minute. Wanting to go to him, but knowing she could not, not yet.

Then this case began in earnest. Testing her in ways she had not been prepared for when she arrived. Thoughts of her advancing age she had not known were so close to the surface. She could not escape the fact that she was getting older. She knew it. She could see it in the mirror every day, how her face was changing, the lines every woman worried about. Did Mulder see her that way when he looked at her or did he see the young woman he fell in love with so long ago? Sometimes it seemed that version of her was buried beneath a mountain of those hideous pantsuits she used to wear, and had been replaced with this older version.

He was older, of course he was, but she found him just as desirable as she ever had. She loved **him** , she did not care about the lines around his face. He simply looked distinguished, rugged, even more handsome, as it seemed to go with men when they aged. He could even get away with greying hair, while she covered hers. The lines on his face showed distinguish and wisdom, while hers just showed age. The double standard there could fuck right off, she thought angrily.

She was not sure if it was her age, her lack of intimacy recently, or simply Judy’s words, but she had felt older these past couple nights. She asked him point blank if he thought she was old. To see what he would say. Looking for reassurance that she was still desirable, especially to him.

His smile as he had sat down next to her and then his response, made her happy. Made her smile. She did not show it too much, though. No reason to encourage his cocky attitude. Especially when he had left her feeling feelings she felt she needed to keep bottled up. At least for the time being.

Because, Jesus, she thought.. sitting there on the bed with him, she had had to resist the urge to climb in his lap and kiss him. To unbutton his shirt a bit more and lick his neck where she knew he liked and would always make him gasp. She wanted his hands on her. Under her shirt, spanning across her back, moving to cup her breasts. Under her skirt, his hands on her ass as he slid his tongue in her mouth. God, she loved kissing him. It was for the best that she got him out of the room when she did, before she acted on those feelings. Or taken his words to heart and knocked three times _._

She took a deep breath and breathed out, staring at the ceiling, shaking her head. She thought of her dream again. It was as if her own subconscious was giving her a sign. Another push since she seemed to need another one. Showing her she needed to decide if she would allow herself to kill her chances or drop the knife and move forward. She could not stay at this impasse anymore. She needed to move or stay still forever.

He had come to her many times now. Never pushing, never demanding anything from her, but letting his presence be known. She knew **she** needed to get up, **she** needed to go to him, and **she** had to get this started. They would never move forward if they continued staring at that starting line. No more hesitancy or fear. Time to move. Decision made, she pushed the covers back and sat up.

She slowly and quietly walked into the room. He was sleeping with his back to her so she was able to get close before he realized she was in the room. Here we go, she thought. Take that step forward.

“Oh. Speak of the devil,” he said as he rolled over.

“I can’t sleep, Mulder.”

“What’s the problem?”

“Something about this case is getting under my skin.” Keep it vague. See how it goes. No sudden moves.

“Well, we’ve had stranger cases, Scully,” he said as he regarded her. Pillow plumped up with his head resting on his hand.

Time to see what happens. She already knew what his answer to her next question would be, but still her stomach was nervous.

“Can you hold me?” Please, she seemed to feel her heart saying, please do not refuse this request. Please see the action being taken, the steps being made.

A beat.

“Yeah.. I can do that,” he said as he pulled the covers back, inviting her to lie down.

Thank fucking god. The starting gun had gone off and one foot had crossed the starting line.

She got into the bed with him. His arms wrapped around her. She was in the Mulder cocoon she loved and missed so much. His comfort and his love, the warmth of his body against hers. So much needed to be said, so much hung in the balance. She just needed to get there. To take that next step.

“What’s gonna happen?” she asked, still keeping it vague, but asking an underlying serious question.

“What’s gonna happen when?” he responded.

“When we’re old,” she said, again asking and showing worry over her age. Was she too old? Dried up, no use to anyone, still rang in her ears..

“What do you mean “when”?” he asked, jokingly.

She smiled slightly. She so badly wanted to ask what she needed to know, but she was being a fucking coward. She felt it. Her fear threatened to choke her.

“I mean.. sooner or later we’re gonna retire and..” she said. Yes, Dana.. keep it about the job.

“Hmm,” he murmured his agreement.

“Are we gonna spend..time together?” she missed him so much. She could not be without him again. She needed him.

“I’ll come push your wheelchair with **my** wheelchair,” he said, close to her ear. His voice and touch made her feel lightheaded.

They laughed quietly at his joke.

“That’s not what I mean,” she still felt like the path was blocked. Someone seemed to have placed hurdles in her path as she tried to keep pace with him. Spit it out, Dana. He is not going to offer it up. He is waiting for you.

“Oh. I’ll always be around, Scully. Offering bulletproof theories of genius that you fail to assail with your inadequate rationality,” he said, lighthearted and noncommittal. She knew he was waiting for more. Knew it in her bones.

She exhaled a laugh. Had to keep up the banter. Get through the jokes to get to the deeper stuff. Fun before serious. Hips before hands.

“And I’ll always be around to prove you wrong,” she wanted to be with him, but she was still terrified to say it. She prayed that he was hearing what she was **not** saying.

“Hmm,” he muttered in agreement.

“Promise.” Forever, Mulder, she thought.

He held her tighter, shifted around a little.

“No, but that’s not what I mean.”

“What do you mean?” he asked, with a sigh. As if he knew. Knew where this was headed.

She sighed. She felt it bubbling. So close now. Here it comes. Say it, Dana. Just fucking say it.

“What if you meet someone?” her biggest fear out there, floating around. If he ever did meet someone.. she was sure it would fucking kill her.

He pulled back and she heard him sigh deeply. She felt braver asking this question when she was not facing him. She did not want him to see her weakness when it came to him. She was supposed to be strong. She always presented herself as such, but when it came to him, she was weak. It scared the shit out of her, being so dependent on him.

“What if you meet someone.. younger who.. wants to have kids?” She felt him sigh deeply, and her heart pounded. God. Please do not let that be a possibility. He would not want someone else..please..

“Oh, that’s what you mean,” he breathed a deep sigh. “Well..you could do the same. You could meet someone and.. have kids,” he said, although she felt his change of tone. Felt his hesitation to say it.

She laughed. “Mulder, that’s not gonna happen.” Finding someone else was out of the question. No one could compare to him.

Besides she was too old, dried up. Who would want someone with nothing to offer?

“That’s nonsense,” he scoffed at her.

“No it’s not. I’m..I’m at the end of that journey,” she said firmly and also sadly.

“Do you want to have more kids?” he asked her seriously.

“Well.. I would have liked to have had another one,” she said not quite believing they are having this discussion **now**. It was years overdue. Why not discuss it when they could have possibly done something? God, they were so bad at communicating how they felt.

“Mm,” he mumbled against her again. She felt the vibrations in her back.

“At the risk of sounding insensitive, what’s..stopping you?” he asked, honestly curious.

“Mmm..besides the fact that the first time was a miracle? And besides the fact that..I don’t..have anyone to have one with even if I could?” she said sadly.

No one would be good enough but him. The Mulder family passed genetic muster. And this Mulder had set up his flag long ago, staking his claim. It was not coming down now. But they were in a weird place. How could she ask him to even entertain the thought when they were not together anymore? Late night bed cuddling notwithstanding.

“You’re a woman of science,” he offered up as a way to maybe figure something out.

She exhaled a laugh. Science only went so far. She could go that route, but where was the love? The man to hold her when she was scared? To offer up bulletproof theories of genius? To curse God for her? To make her laugh and feel so loved? No. This time science had failed her.

“Mulder, sometimes I think the world is going to hell and that we’re the only two people who can save it,” she said, knowing the visions she had seen and the shitshow the country was in at the moment.

“The world **is** going to hell, Scully. The president working to bring down the FBI along with it,” he said in a disgusted tone.

“What if we lose our jobs?” she asked him.

“Yeah. **Then** what would we do?” he asked back, leaving the path clear.

She lie there thinking. What would they do? This job.. it had become about him, about them. If they did not have that again, where would that lead? Separate lives? Not seeing each other again? No. That was not something she desired. She needed him and he needed her. She wanted to go back. No.. not back, forward. She needed to move, to take that step. The path was clear again. She could almost see the finish line. She rolled over and stared at him. Looked him up and down and smiled. Time to cross that line. Together.

“We’ll think of something,” she said with a smile. He stared and smiled back. She looked at his lips and took a breath.

His hand on her stomach grounded her, his eyes bore into hers. She saw him look at her lips and she took another breath.

“Scully,” he whispered. “I’m here. When you’re ready. I’m right here.” His hand slid down to her hip, holding her, but not demanding anything.

“Mulder..” she whispered as she touched his face, shaking her head slightly. Stroking his cheek and then his lips. He closed his eyes at her touch.

“I’m ready,” she said barely above a whisper. He opened his eyes and searched her face.

She smiled at him, her hand going to his neck. “I’m ready,” she said in a stronger voice, tears in her eyes.

He smiled and kept his eyes on her. “Then kiss me,” he said quietly, a smile on his lips.

And she did. She kissed him like he was all the oxygen she needed for the rest of her life. As if she would never get a chance to breathe again. She kissed his lips, his cheeks, his neck as he pulled her close and then on top of him.

She straddled him as she kissed him deeply, her tongue stroking across his, his hands on her ass, just as she had wanted earlier. She moaned into his mouth as she felt him begin to harden under her.

She pulled back from him and started unbuttoning her top. He moved her hands and did it for her. As soon as her top was open, he put his hands on her waist and slid them around her back, pushing her back down to his mouth. His hands ran across her back and up to her hair, holding her against him.

Her breasts pressed to his chest made her dizzy. So many memories of this exact situation and position presented themselves to her. Rainy nights, hot mornings, afternoons where they had spent hours just exploring each other’s bodies.

She pushed up and slipped her shirt off, tossing it behind her. She heard him groan as his hands landed on her waist and slid up to cup her breasts. She gasped as he squeezed them and then rolled her nipples. Her head fell back and she rested her hands on his thighs.

“Mulder,” she moaned as she rocked her hips against him.

He grabbed her waist and flipped them so he was on top. She giggled at the sudden movement and then sighed when he kissed her neck and licked under her jaw. He kept going down and kissing her body. She ran her fingers in his hair and smiled.

God, she missed feeling him on her. His lips, his hands, his weight. His smell surrounding her as he brought her pleasure. He stopped at her breasts and took one in his mouth, sucking and then nipping at her nipple. She cried out and felt herself get wet. Sweet Jesus.. this man..

He took the other breast in his mouth as he held the other in his hand. He squeezed lightly and then pinched her nipple and she bucked into him. She could feel his beginning erection pressing into her through their clothes. She wanted him inside her so badly, it had been far too long.

“Mulder,” she gasped as he took his mouth off her breast and held both of them in his hands, staring at them, as if seeing them for the very first time.

“Scully,” he said quietly, shaking his head, as he leaned down, holding her breasts in his hands, covering her more with his weight. He looked into her eyes, so full of love, “how could you be worried about being “old”? You are so beautiful it makes me ache. You always have been, and you always will be. Your mind, your body. You are beauty personified. Please don’t ever doubt that you are not.” He stared at her as her eyes filled with tears and she smiled slightly. He nodded at her and then lifted up again.

He continued his descent down her body. She laid back and stroked his hair as she felt his mouth on her stomach, her belly button. Then his fingers gripped the sides of her pajama bottoms and pulled. She shimmied her hips to allow him easier access. She heard his deep exhale at finding her without underwear. She smirked. Then, she felt the smoothness of the pants slide all the way off her body, to be replaced by his hands stroking up her legs. Jesus Christ..

He picked up where he left off and kissed across her stomach, dipping his tongue in her belly button and swirling it around. She panted and gripped his head. She felt him smile against her skin as he kissed there once again. Then his lips were on her hip bones, kissing and licking his way across them.

She arched her body toward him and he grinned as he raised his head and looked at her. She met his eyes and he smiled wickedly. She raised her eyebrows at him and he licked his lips and looked down, then back up at her again. She stopped breathing and felt her body respond to his look.

He moved down and held her legs open as he settled between them. She felt her legs shake as she knew where he was headed. He was so good at this act, she felt almost on the verge already. It would not take long to make her scream.

He kissed her center and then licked from bottom to top, sucking her clit as he reached it.

“Mulder!” she screamed, her legs squeezing his head as her fingernails dug into his scalp.

He sucked harder and then licked her flatly with his tongue. He ran his hands up and down the outsides of her thighs as he kissed and tongued her. She whined and thrust her hips into his face, crying his name over and over. His short nails scratched along her thighs and her body shook.

He moved his hands and put one arm on her waist and brought the other to her opening. He lifted his mouth and looked at her as he slid two fingers inside her. She gasped and arched her back off the bed. His arm holding her firm.

“Mulder, oh my god. Jesus, I’m so close. Fuck..” she cried as she felt him sliding his fingers in and out.

“Scully, lean up on your elbows and watch me. I want you to look at me while I make you come. I want to see your face,” he said in his gravelly sex voice. Her legs shook again.

It had been so long since she heard that voice, felt his mouth on her, his fingers sliding inside her. Fuck, she wanted to scream. To bring the walls down with her screams of pleasure. What did he say? Oh, right.. he wanted to watch her come. Well, it would not be long now.

She pulled herself up on her elbows and she could see his fingers sliding in and out, at the same time she could feel them. She watched for a few seconds, his fingers shiny with her wetness. She felt her orgasm building.

She looked at his face and his eyes were so dark, so deep, she could have drown in them. He bent and licked her clit as he slid his fingers in and out all the way a few times. Then slid them in and crooked them toward himself as he sucked her clit into his mouth.

“JESUS CHRIST!” she screamed as she felt her climax explode all around her. She felt wave after wave of it coursing through her body. She could not keep her eyes open as they rolled back in her head and she bucked her hips hard into his face.

He kept licking softly as he slowly slid his fingers in and out. She was shaking all over and felt like she was floating above herself. Jesus fucking Christ he was so good as that, she thought as she took a deep breath and looked down at him.

He still had his eyes on her as he licked her and then kissed her again as he slid his fingers out of her. He raised his head and sucked them into his mouth and stared at her as he licked them clean. Her heart was pounding and she was not sure she could have been any wetter, and then he did that, his eyes never leaving hers.

“Mulder.. fuck.. that was..fucking amazing. Oh.. sweet Jesus. Get up here and.. kiss me,” she panted out as she sat up and reached for him. 

He pulled his fingers from his mouth and climbed over her, pushing her back down. She felt his erection, big and hard, bump her center and she moaned. She needed a minute, and he knew it. He always knew.

He loomed over her, his hands on either side of her as she wrapped her legs around his waist, holding him loosely. He came up higher and his erection prodded her stomach. She gripped the back of his head and pulled him down for a kiss.

Oh.. she loved tasting herself on his mouth. Sharing that with him. She knew he loved going down on her and that he loved when she kissed him so thoroughly when he was done. It was a turn on for both of them and fucking hell had she missed it.

She moaned as his tongue slid against hers and she felt him against her. She pulled back and let go of him as she moved her legs to hold on tighter.

“Mulder, I’m ready. I want you inside me,” she said, still a little out of breath, as she reached down to grasp him and rub the head of his cock through his boxers.

“Scully,” he hissed and pulled her hand away. “I.. this.. it’s going to be very fast and be over too quickly if you do that. I.. just give me a minute,” he said apologetically as he leaned his forehead against hers.

“I don’t care if it’s fast. I.. I just want to feel you Mulder. It’s been so long, I need you right now. Please,” she begged as she wrapped her legs tighter around him, pulling him closer.

He pulled back from her and looked in her eyes. She smiled at him and she reached up with both hands and held his face. She took a deep breath and leaned up to kiss him again, running her tongue across his lips.

He sat back and she let him go. He stood up and pulled his boxers off and his tank top. He settled back between her legs. He brought her legs up around his hips as he began to slowly slide into her.

“It’s been awhile, right? Best to stick with the classic position. See how the old girl performs” he breathed as she gasped and gave him a look. He slid all the way in and her legs tightened around him, holding him still.

“That better not have been a crack about me.. oh fuck..” she moaned, feeling her body stretch to accept him. Yes..this was what she had been missing.

He leaned over her, laughed and waited. She took a deep breath and exhaled, relaxing her tight grip on him. He pulled out and then pushed back in as they both groaned. He slid forward on his forearms and begin thrusting a little faster.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” he said close to her ear. “In no way was that.. a crack about you.. Jesus, Scully.. you feel so fucking good. And did I not just tell you how beautiful you are? Ahh.. shit.. well they say hearing is the first to go.”

She laughed, and clenched her inner muscles, causing him to gasp. Then it was her turn to gasp as he picked up the pace. She met his thrusts and pulled him closer to her with her arms around him. She ran her nails down his back, relishing touching skin she had not felt in so long. She turned her face and buried her nose in his neck, inhaling his scent as he went even faster. God, she was already close to the edge again. She began repeating his name like a chant as she felt another orgasm approaching.

“Scully,” he said in a strained voice, “I’m.. shit.. I’m so close. I..” he slowed down and she whined.

“No, Mulder, don’t slow down.. I need you to go faster.. please, I’m so close again. Oh..” she cried out as he did begin to go faster again, the couch bed shaking with his thrusts, thumping into the wall.

He raised up on his arms, palms planted on either side of her head and thrust harder. She unlocked her legs and planted her feet on the bed as she met his thrusts. She knew it would not be long for either of them. She knew his tells- the way he held his breath, how his body would stiffen. He was close.

Then she felt his exhale and he cried out her name as he came, spilling inside her. His release triggered her own and she cried his name as she came. They fell over the edge together and then he collapsed on top of her, panting and saying her name.

She tried to catch her breath as he lay heavy upon her. She was breathing hard, her body still humming with pleasure and she did not want him to move. She loved feeling him on her, in her. She wrapped her legs around him again. It had been too long since she had been with him and she had missed him terribly.

He kissed her neck as he lay on her and she shivered with the feeling. She heard him whispering her name as he peppered her neck with kisses, telling her she was beautiful, so beautiful.

She ran her nails up and down his back, into his hair, then down again. He was sweaty and she loved knowing it was from their joining together again. She felt so peaceful, so happy, content.

He kissed her neck again and lifted his head. They smiled at each other and kissed slowly, tongues languidly stroking, before he began to pull back. She groaned but dropped her legs and let him go. As soon as he moved she felt the chill of the room and she shivered. Mulder slid his boxers back on and grabbed the sheet. He covered her and kissed her before he walked to the other side of the bed.

She covered all the way up, chilly as the cool air hit her sweaty skin. He slid next to her and she put her head on his shoulder. He turned his head and kissed her forehead. She hummed and scooted closer, tired but completely sated. Then her eyes flew open.

“Oh.. Mulder..” she groaned. “I left my phone in the car. Shit..” she whined and started to get up. He sat up and pushed her back down, covering her again.

“I’ll get it for you, Scully. You go outside like that and you’re liable to give everyone within a twenty mile radius a heart attack,” he said as he slid his tank top on again.

She laughed huskily as she snuggled back into the pillows. “Well, I was going to get dressed before I did.”

“Don’t you fucking dare,” he said as he walked out of the room and she heard the door open and close. She laughed again and breathed in the scent of his pillows.

He was back relatively quickly. She heard him drop the keys down, and her phone being plugged in to charge. She smiled at his thoughtfulness. Then he got back in bed with her.

She scooted closer and rested her chin on his shoulder, covered with the sheet to keep off the chill. She breathed deeply and evenly.

“Thank you, Mulder,” she whispered to him, the simple sentiment holding many meanings.

He hummed out a response. “Whatever you need, Scully. I’m here.”

“I’m glad to hear that, Mulder,” she said sleepily.

His answering chuckle and deep breath were the last things she heard before she dropped off to sleep.

 


	2. And Then They Had Sex.. Twice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuation of the episode from Mulder’s perspective. What he wants, moving forward.

Mulder could hear Scully breathing softly next to him. Her chin on his shoulder, her body pressed against his. She had come in claiming she was unable to sleep. Well, he thought with a pleased smile, she seemed worn out now.

He sobered as his mind replayed the last hour. Not the sex, no. Although, he thought glancing at her, seeing the curves of her body the sheet created, it had been fucking wonderful. Faster than he would have liked, but shit, it **had** been awhile. A long while. He smiled softly as she shifted a little and moaned, breathing his name. God, he had missed that sound.

He leaned his head against hers and then slightly shook it. He thought of their conversation earlier, still astounded by what she had said, the questions she had laid on him.

_“What if you meet someone?”_

He knew she had been searching, feeling him out. Seeing where they were going, professionally and personally, but that question..it shook him. He had been comfortably holding her and feeling content and drowsy. Then that question woke him the fuck up.

He literally had to pull back from her to construct an answer. He felt anger for a second that she would take the cowards way out and ask that when she could not see his face. Not see the emotions and shock that ran across his face at the mere suggestion of finding someone else.

He knew her though and what she was asking terrified her. She was strong, much stronger than him. Admitting she needed him, depended on him, it scared the shit out of her. He knew that, knew it in his very soul. Showing that vulnerability was hard enough for her. Asking in the dark, not facing him, was not cowardice. It was fear and she was ashamed of it.

They had not discussed anything like they should, but yet there she was, reaching out. She was trying. He knew he could not lay too much on at once, so he had bit his tongue and held back what he wanted to say to her. That finding someone else was out of the question. She was it for him. Forever. Fucking hell, he had even asked to have her with him in a simulated life.

“ _It wouldn’t be her.”_

The fuck it would not. They would find a way. He would find her and it would be her. It would be them. He had not wanted to even entertain the afterlife without her, how could she think he wanted to live this actual one without her?

“ _What if you meet someone.. younger who.. wants to have kids?”_

Children. More kids. They never talked about that before. Why the fuck not? Years wasted where discussions were not had. He shook his head again at their terrible lack of communicating how they truly felt and what they wanted. The past was the past, however and it could not be changed.

Still, the thought of her thinking he would leave her for something as mundane as children, broke him a little. He had never entertained, nor would he ever, the thought of leaving her because she was unable to conceive. If she was unable to have children, **he** was unable to have them. This was a partnership and they were in this together. For better or for worse.

They needed to talk, to move things forward. Tonight was a huge step, gigantic for them, but it did not fix everything. They needed to talk. He glanced over at her again and slid out of bed. He needed to use the bathroom.

He took a drink of water from the spout and then wiped his mouth. He stared at himself in the mirror. He could still taste her. The memories of the sex they had made him smile. You still got it man, he thought to himself as he smiled at his reflection.

Then he saw it, saw him, his double. Holy fucking shit. He was mesmerized and terrified all at once. He could not look away, but had to get out of there. Scully. He had to get to her.

“Scully, get up. Get dressed,” he said terrified, as he took off his tank top.

“Mmm, come back to bed,” she moaned. He would have been there in a second if that fucker was not possibly following him.

“They’re coming after me,” he said trying to cut through her sleep addled thoughts.

“What are you talking about?” She asked, sounding confused.

“I was just looking in the mirror, and there he was. There I was. It wasn’t my reflection. It was my double,” he said glancing back repeatedly at the bathroom as he put on his shirt and buttoned it up.

“I know. I-I-I saw my double too,” she said as she leaned up on her elbow, admitting she had seen hers as well.

“They’re targeting us both.”

“That’s how they operate, Mulder,” she said trying to calm him down.

“I know how they operate!” He said putting on his pants.

“You’re just playing into it,” again said with a tone of rationalism.

“Spare me the pop psychology, okay?” He said as he struggled into his pants.

“Mulder, you have to calm down,” she said with an exasperated tone.

“Scully. Scully, put a dimmer on that afterglow and get yourself to the hospital before they hang us both,” he said buttoning his pants, grabbing his jacket and keys, then heading for the door.

“Mulder, they can’t hang us. We-we can only hang ourselves if we panic,” she said trying to get through to him one last time.

“How many letters in Scully, Scully?” He asked her, as if that answered everything and proved his point.

He ran out the door and to the car.

Hours later, he pulled back into the hotel parking lot. He rested his head against the headrest as he turned off the ignition. God, he was worn out. Fighting with yourself will do that to a man, he thought, as he rolled his muscles around.

Also, the sex he had earlier added to it, he thought with a grin. But **that** kind of worn out was welcome and most definitely enjoyed. Scully was back already, hopefully not asleep and maybe interested in doing that again. Play it cool man, let her come to you, he said to himself as he took the keys out of the ignition, got out, locked the door, and walked to their room.

He took a deep breath, then quickly made sure his shirt was good and open. Maybe a little sneak peek of the goods would get her fire burning. Oh yeah. This plan was foolproof. He adjusted his shirt and laid his jacket over his arm. He breathed out and opened the door.

She looked up as he entered and then continued putting the bagged evidence in her bag.

“So, I was thinking maybe we could get a couple hours in before checkout time?” He said, leaving the double meaning out there seeing if she would pick up on it, what she would say.

She looked at him, indicating he was thinking something else and she was **not** having it.

“I’m just talking about getting some shut-eye.” Feigning surprise at her suggesting he would even think of imagining something else. 

“I’m glad to hear that, Mulder.” She said, though she clearly did not believe him. But she looked at his chest, he saw it. Yes.. he knew it was a good plan.

“Yeah. Uh, I guess I should hit the hay.” He said not quite sure what to do, but not ready to leave.

“Okay,” she said dismissively, but he saw her look at his chest again. Oh.. that’s right, he knew what she liked.

“Yeah. But if you need anything, you just, uh, call me,” he said, letting it hang there that he was willing if she wanted him.

“I can’t imagine that I will,” she said in what others might hear as a rude or dismissive.

He had known her for far too long, however, and he knew her expressions. He could read her like a book. She stared at him and he stared back. He nodded, looked her up and down, and walked out of the room shutting the door behind him.

He turned around immediately and waited. He knew she would be coming. He **knew** it. He leaned against the door jamb and he began to count. ..5...10...15.. 20 seconds and he heard the doorknob turn.

Then there she was, as he knew she would be. Knew she would come, sure as the sun rises and sets every day. He smiled a small smile. Happy in the knowledge he was right and he let her be the one to make this decision. His heart began to race, and he felt a stirring in his groin, at what he knew was going to happen.

“Well, hello there. **Did** you need something after all?” He asked in a low voice that he knew she loved.

Her smile lit up the room as she stepped inside, closing the door behind her.

“Shut up, Mulder,” she said as she grabbed his jacket from him and threw it across the room.

She ripped his shirt open and buttons flew everywhere. She grabbed his neck and wrapped her arms around him as she jumped and wrapped her legs around his waist. He was surprised for one second before he slammed her into the door. Her mouth was on his and her tongue was demanding entrance inside.

Her nails scratched the back of his neck and into his hair. He thrust his hips into her and he grabbed her ass, pushing her harder into the door. She gasped and let go of his mouth.

“God, you’re already hard,” she gasped as he thrust into her again.

“Not completely, but I’m getting there,” he said, sucking her neck as her head fell back against the door.

He cupped her ass tighter and tried to hold her up. She giggled and he felt it against his mouth.

“You okay, Mulder?” She asked as she held on tighter, a little worried he might drop her.

“You’re not the only who’s getting older, Scully. This isn’t as easy as it used to be,” he said trying to keep them both safe.

She laughed, a full throaty laugh and started to disentangle herself from him. He let go of her ass and let her down gently. Her back was still against the door and he used that to his advantage, pushing her into it as he kissed her again. His tongue mating with hers, the way he knew she liked.

She sucked his tongue and he groaned. At the same time, he felt her unbuttoning his pants. He groaned again as she slipped her hand inside and begin stroking him as best she could with his clothes still on. He gasped into her mouth and then pulled away, determined to get his fucking pants off.

She grabbed his open shirt with her other hand and pulled him to her, not letting him move away.

“Hold still. No, actually,” she said and turned them so his back was against the door. She grabbed the waistband of his pants and started pushing them down, taking his boxers along with them.

She followed them down and was soon face to face with his cock. She smiled at it, then looked up and smiled at him.

He watched her the whole time, thinking this must be too good to be true. It had been so long since she did this for him. Her nails scraped the backs of his legs as she pulled him closer and she took him in her mouth.

“FUUUUUCK, Scully!!” He cried out loudly, as his head fell back against the door and he had to fight not thrusting into her face. He knew better than that.

She brought a hand around and took him out of her mouth. She stroked him and he placed a hand on her head, not pushing, just touching. She looked up at him as he looked down. Her eyes were full of lust as she took him back in her mouth and began moving her mouth up and down his shaft.

“Jesus, Scully. That feels so fucking good. Oh my god.” He grabbed her hair and held onto it, letting her set the pace.

She made him feel so good as she altered the use of her hands and her mouth. She knew just how to please him as he knew how for her. He did not want to come too quickly, so he gave her hair a little tug and she looked up at him.

“I want to be inside you when I come,” he told her. She took her mouth off him and licked her lips. Shit, that was almost his undoing.

She stood up and kissed him, putting her hand on him and stroking lightly. He grabbed her wrist and spun them around. He grabbed the other one, held them both above her head, and pushed her into the door. His cock trapped between their bodies.

“I don’t want you to do that again, do you hear me?” He growled at her as he pushed hard into her.

She began to breathe hard and she stared at him with fire in her eyes. Oh.. this was going to be fun.  

Amid kisses and touching, their clothes were quickly scattered across the room. They fell on the bed together and she crawled up his body. He let her take control. He loved her like this, so wild and free. He scooted back until he was sitting, leaning against the back of the pullout couch. She climbed onto him until she was straddling him. He had his face on her breasts as he held her and she went up and down, holding onto him for dear life, taking her pleasure, calling out his name.

She moaned again and used his shoulders for leverage. He bent his knees giving her some extra support. She groaned and cried out that she was close. He knew it. He could feel it, feel her tightening around him.

“MULDERRRRR!” She cried as she came and broke around him. She rested her head on his shoulder as she slowed down and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“Hmmm… hmm.. hmm, Mulder..oh my god. Oh..” she whimpered into his neck as he felt her spasming around him. She shuddered again and raised her head and looked at him.

He brushed her sweaty hair off her face and smiled at her. She could not seem to focus on him, as she ran her fingers in his hair. She dropped her forehead to his and took deep breaths.

“Oh..wow.. Mulder..I..” she whispered.

“Speechless,” he said as he stroked her back. “I can’t say I’m surprised.”

“Shut up,” she told him again, laughing as she leaned back and looked him in the eyes.

He smiled at her and pulled her in for a kiss.

“Your turn,” she whispered as she broke from the kiss and began to move again.

“Okay,” he said and flipped them over. He started thrusting fast, ready to get there with her.  

“Oh,” she cried out. “Yes that feels so good. No, wait… let me..”

A quick scramble and she had her legs against his chest, her ankles around his neck. He was thrusting into her, surprised by her flexibility.

“Have you taken up yoga, Scully?” He asked her.

“Mulder, shut up and fuck me,” she cried and pushed against him, meeting his thrusts.

He slid onto his forearms and thrust even more.

“Harder! Faster!” She cried as she impressively moved her legs again and wrapped them around his hips, digging her ankles into his ass, pushing him forward.

He did as she demanded and went harder and faster. He felt her tightening around him again and heard her panting breath. Her nails were digging into his shoulders, holding onto him.

“Oh oh oh, Mulder. Oh shit. Oh my god. FUCK!!” She screamed as she came again.

“Scullllly! Fuck! Oh god!” He cried as he came, thrusting hard, the couch bed shaking as he collapsed onto her again. Both of them panting and clinging to each other.

They needed to sleep. She was exhausted. He knew because she kept yawning and telling him every few minutes. She was lying flat on her stomach, her head turned away from him, the pillows somewhere on the floor. Mulder was running his fingers lightly up and down her back as he lie on his side, his head on his hand. Her skin was so goddamn soft.

“Scully?” He asked quietly, not sure if she was sleeping.

“Hmmmm..” came her response.

“I.. I want to take this slow,” he said quietly still and placed a kiss on her shoulder. “Contrary to what we did tonight, I don’t want to rush this. Do it right.”

“Hmm..by “this”.. you mean..?” She asked sleepily, a teasing tone in her voice.

“Will you have dinner with me tonight?” He whispered, his mouth against her skin.

She turned over onto her side. facing him. She looked at him with sparkling eyes. “Are you asking me on a date?”

“I am,” he said, his eyes serious, hopeful.

She stared at him and smiled. The soft smile. The one that made his heart pound.

“Yes,” she whispered, touching his face.

He pulled her close, his heart pounding. He took a deep breath, his nose in her hair.

“Except..” she said as she snuggled into his arms. Her head in his neck, her mouth on his throat. “Can we order in, or pick something up? I want to do **this** again, and I don’t want to get arrested for public indecency.”

He laughed and pulled her tighter to him, bringing his leg around her hip.

“It’s a date,” he said, kissing her forehead, still chuckling. She exhaled in his neck and hummed.

He closed his eyes and slept better than he had in a long time.

They packed up after a couple hours sleep, stealing glances and kisses as they did. He lifted her up against the wall again, to prove to her he could, and she laughed. He shut her up by kissing her until she was like putty in his hands. He pulled back and smirked at her dizzy expression. She narrowed her eyes and promised he would pay for that later. He told her he was looking forward to it.

They loaded up the car then pulled them both up by the manager's office. They planned to drop the extra one off on the way out of town. Scully headed toward the stairs to drop off the room keys and check them out of their room. There was a woman inside so she went back and waited by the car with Mulder.

“I’d like to know what you intend to do about it,” the woman in the manager's office demanded, with her arms crossed. Her young son stood in front of her, eating the lollipop that Mary, the manager, had given him.

“Miss, I don’t know what you would like me to do,” Mary said kindly but with a slightly annoyed tone.

“It’s **_Mrs._ ** ” she said and Mary could practically see the amount of emphasis she would put if she had printed out this conversation. “ **_Mrs._ ** Deller. And I expect you to say something to those.. those **people** who were using such vulgar and loud language.”

“Well, **_Mrs_**. Deller, what language would that be?” Mary asked, hoping to get a rise out of her. God, she was a horrible woman. The exact kind she almost always hated upon first glance. The “we need fresh towels, sheets, blankets, pillows” type, even though the room had just been cleaned.

“Humph! I cannot begin to tell you **everything** , it was too vulgar. But,” she covered her son’s ears, “I heard loud screaming and moaning. There was banging against the wall from their “activities” and I heard the word F-U-C-K many times,” she lifted her hands from her son’s ears and gave Mary a significant look. “Also the word “cock.”

“A-doodle-do!” The little boy shouted and Mary burst out laughing. The boy grinned at her and Mary put her hand out for a high five, which he gladly gave her.

“Well! I’m glad you seem to think this is so funny and acceptable. We travel this way many times a year and we will **not** be stopping her again,” **_Mrs_ **. Deller said as she collected her things and began pushing her son toward the door.

“I’m sorry you feel that way **ma’am** , I hope your stay otherwise was pleasant,” Mary said with a smirk. She huffed in response and opened the door.

Her son looked back and waved at Mary, took his lollipop out of his mouth and said, “Cock-a-doodle-do!” much to his mother’s absolute horror.

Mary laughed and said it back to him. She watched them walk out and almost bump right into the woman she was complaining about. Mary heard the woman offer an apology and **_Mrs_**. Deller simply huffed again. Mary had just a second to compose her face before the other woman opened the door.

She walked in and over to the desk. The redheaded woman smiled at her. Oh yeah, bet she had **a lot** to smile about this afternoon. Mary smiled back, as the word “cock” bounced around in her head. She could still see the bitchy woman who had complained, forcefully ushering her husband and family into the car. She saw her glare over at the office and then slam the child’s car door with a furious shake of her head. God, **that** woman needed some cock in her life.

“I’d like to check out of the suite we were in, settle the bill, give you the keys,” she said as she handed her the keys.

“Not a problem, Miss..” Mary said as she took the keys.

“Scully. Just Scully, no Miss,” Scully told her with a smile.

“Well.. Scully, I hope your stay was...enjoyable,” she said with a look her way as she typed up some information on the computer and then waited for the printer.

She caught the almost secretive smile, before Scully arranged her face back in a professional manner.

“Yes, it was enjoyable, thank you. The room was very.. conducive,” Scully said.

“Hmm,” Mary said jovially with a twinkle in her eyes as she looked at Scully. Right then Mary knew that Scully knew. Knew someone had heard them and said something or maybe Mary herself heard them. Scully blushed and looked down. But then raised her face back up and stared defiantly at her.

Mary stared back and smiled at her. She could tell those two were not just hooking up or involved in a clandestine affair. She had seen them talking outside their cars. Seen his smile as he looked at her. She remembered taking out the trash last night and seeing him run out in his under clothes with no shoes, and get something out of her car. Yeah, he cared for her. Her own husband would have done the same thing for her, god rest his soul.

They stared at one another and then Scully smiled back at her. Understanding and respect shared between them. The printer stopped printing and Mary grabbed the paperwork for her to sign.

“Uh.. is there a diner or someplace close by you would recommend?” Scully asked as she handed the paperwork back to her. “Maybe a place with pie?”

“Well, there’s a diner down the way, Grandma Ruby’s, they have really good food. The pie is wonderful. Of course, it doesn’t have a claim to fame, like the place where my sister used to work.”

“Claim to fame?” Scully asked, intrigued by the comment.

“Yeah, my sister worked at a place out in California for years. She loved it. They had a chocolate cream pie, she used to claim was “better than sex.” Well, **almost**. She said they had to add the “almost” after a customer insisted upon it. She has talked about that woman a lot over the years. How she was sassy and said the description should be changed. Mentioned her boyfriend too. How he was a good looking man in a leather jacket,” Mary said with a smile as she filed away the paperwork Scully had signed.

“Is.. this is absolutely crazy.. but by some insane chance, is your sister’s name Carol?” Scully asked her, shaking her head, completely amazed at this information.

“You know Carol?” Mary asked her incredulously, not believing this could be happening.

Mulder looked up from his phone as he stood by the car, when he heard peals of laughter coming from inside the office. He saw Scully and the manager laughing and their hands moving a lot as they talked. Scully threw her head back and laughed. The manager had hers down as she laughed too. What was going on?

The door opened and Scully stepped out still laughing as she said goodbye. The woman laughed and shouted it back as Scully closed the door.

“What the hell was that all about?” He asked, smiling and absolutely puzzled as she walked up to him.

“Oh my god, Mulder! You’re never going to believe this!” She said with laughter in her voice.

Inside the office, Mary was still laughing as she dialed the phone and waited for it to be answered.

“Carol!” She said as she looked out the window, and smiled and waved to Scully as they both drove off. “You are never going to believe this!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter. I love the fun they have when they have sex. Poking fun at each other, messing around, being silly. But then the love they have for each other comes out in the serious moments. ❤️ 
> 
> As per a personal request ❤️, I hope you enjoyed the introduction of a fun secondary character. I do so love creating people to view them from a different lens. And Carol is back! Well, kind of. I love Scully interacting with other women as she so rarely does. She needs some girlfriends, but let’s face it, that’s not going to happen. Mulder is all she wants and needs.

**Author's Note:**

> So.. on first viewing of this conversation, I was left feeling wronged. Here they were in a bed, cuddling, and they’re talking about him meeting someone? Her not having someone to try to have a baby with? What?! 
> 
> But then I got it- she’s scared and can’t come out and say how she feels. Even though it seems they have moved past that point, they haven’t. These two? Talk about their thoughts and feelings? Nah.. they don’t really do that, or show it. 
> 
> But, that’s what fanfic is for right? To step in and give those scenes the extra kick it needs. The things we wish we HAD seen. ❤️


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